i can't change my mould

nothing is satisfying, right now nothing. i hate the responsibility that will be placed on me but responsibility is what i'm looking forward to. i don't want to be this fucking low life i am right now, i'm young and i'm suppose to be but i tend to hate everything more when i don't have anything to do or when there is no motivation. i am happy when i'm forced into something but can't stand you forcing me into this bullshit again. there's a reason. i'm really frustrated right now. i need not to be alone thinking about how fucking retarded i am or how much i hate everyone. i'm happier when i fake a smile to a stranger. actually i think i love swimming in my own bullshit. i feel the cycle approaching.

however i really believe routine and responsibility will make me happy. but happiness to me is distraction. a job, an education, rent and bills to pay, a schedule for my day and constant to do lists will distract me from me. excellent.

when will you do what you say you'll do

sometimes all it takes is a little bit of effort. and a postage stamp.



I want to be a good woman
And I want, for you to be a good man.
This is why I will be leaving
And this is why, I can't see you no more.
I will miss your heart so tender
And I will love
This love forever

I don't want be a bad women
And I can't stand to see you be a bad man
I will miss your heart so tender
And I will love
This love forever
And this is why I am leaving
And this is why I can't see you no more
This is why I am lying when I say
That I don't love you no more

I'll be happy on the day it dies.

It's nice to know you lost something that never actually meant anything special. Like the stupid shit in my room that I hold onto just in case. Just throw it away or use it for inspiration.

independence day.