i've learned a lot in the past three weeks and i must say i like where this is going and how things are now. i finally feel like this is what i want. and if it doesnt work out..well i'm not too concerned about it because i know things are good and i will always be fine. that's a good feeling to have.

i know i've bitched about someone 'close' to me but i'm glad i can see how she is and how she lives her life so i don't live mine that way.. learning from other people's mistakes.. i don't want to be in a relationship that will make me and my surroundings miserable and knowing that i'm not in that position, or even close, makes me very thankful.

the city late at night all alone is a pretty awesome thing. i try not to let people bring me down so i decided to go to the logan fountain to pass the time. i didn't have to buy anything, i didn't have to force smiles, i just got to see the innocence in children. these four little kids were adorable and something must have been telling 'amberly' to come and ask me what my name was. she was like a saint or an angel or something of that nature. and we were just dead and happy in our after life, watching the water and feeling its cold relief and enjoying the company of one another. her face was beautiful and her spirit, like no other. it made me feel like teaching chlidren was the right thing to do.